LIFE
Immortality: The cold and flu
germs strike back
by Andy Breslin
I’ve got a cold right now that obviously strangled the guards to escape from a top-secret germ warfare lab.
Feb 8, 2004

SOCIETY
In Praise of Paris Hilton
by Joseph R. Muller
My esteem for Paris has nothing to do with her come-hither looks, her ability to buy Third World countries simply by selling half her wardrobe, or even her discernible lack of talent.
Feb 8, 2004

SOCIETY
Choosing The Reich Hitler
by Brian Sack
The free association of Hitler with everything negative, no matter how trivial, has caused a certain glossing-over of the real reasons why Hitler is one of history's all-time Very Bad Men, if not the Most Bad. This is not good. [more...]
Feb 8, 2004

POLITICS
The Bush Conspiracy Theory Generator
by Jennifer
Want to come up with your own conspiracy theory about Bush? Don't let Al Franken, Michael Moore, and MoveOn.org have all the fun! Use this handy George W. Bush Conspiracy Theory Generator to come up with your own conspiracy theory! [more...]
Jan 1, 2004

SOCIETY
The Friendster Series
by Jennifer
Everything you've ever wanted to know about Friendster...and more. [more...]
Oct 27, 2003

SOCIETY
To Rule That Which We Cannot Find
by Christopher Swanson
A recent quiz asked American youth relatively basic questions concerning geography. Where is Iraq on a map? Where is the United States? Where is New York? You get the idea. As it turns out, my peers didn’t perform too terribly well. As a matter of fact, their efforts could only be characterized as pathetic. [more...]
Oct 26, 2003

SPORTS
One For the Sports Fans: The Final Word on Which Teams Are Overranked
by Joe Fulwiler
A huge part of societal discourse in this country revolves around talking smack about sports. You have probably heard your drunk friends and crazy uncles espousing theories about bias in the preseason college rankings and favoritism towards certain teams. [more...]
Oct 25, 2003

SOCIETY
Do Brides Understand What It Means to Get Married?
by Jennifer
I’m happy to finally be married, but a few more weeks of being surrounded by brides may have made me cynical beyond repair. There’s a real problem when most brides confuse a marriage ceremony with an ego-fest photo shoot. [more...]
Oct 23, 2003

SOCIETY
What Are the Odds?
by Kenneth E. O'Banion
The odds against being struck and killed by lightning are a little over two million to one. (Since the official odds of winning the lottery are about one in twenty-five million and change, if you plan to strike it rich playing PowerBall, you might consider staying indoors during thunderstorms.)
Aug 27, 2003

POLITICS
Recall Yes!...Or Not
by Jason Anderson
Getting recalled is exactly the kind of thing that I like to see happen to incompetent boobs like Gray Davis. But now that it's actually happening, it's like inheriting a house from my crazy great aunt, the one who dabbled in witchcraft; I'm not exactly sure it's a good thing.
Aug 19, 2003

LIFE
Bidding Farewell to a Tasty,
Murderous Friend
by Christopher Swanson
I quit smoking two days ago and I'm finding nicotine withdrawal to be everything it was cracked up to be. My pupils are dilated, my legs are shaking, and I'm spending 35 minutes of every hour praying for my own death.
Aug 18, 2003

FUN
Help the Texas Democrats
Find the State Capitol!
by Jennifer Bishop
Oh, no! The Texas Democrats have spent so much time in other states lately that they've forgotten how to get to the state capitol to do their jobs! Help them find their way from an out-of-state motel back to Austin.
Aug 9, 2003

SOCIETY
Why Stop With a Ban on Smoking?
A list of a few other things the city council should ban while they're at it.
by Jennifer
Apr 17, 2003

SOCIETY
Having It All
Thoughts on the career vs. family debate.
by Jennifer
Apr 17, 2003

POLITICS
Letters to Buttafly
Some excellent input from readers about the anti-war protest article.
by Jennifer
Mar 14, 2003

POLITICS
Greetings From an Anti-War Protest
Observations from the middle of a crowd of 60,000 people in San Francisco.
by Jennifer
Feb 21, 2003

POLITICS
The San Francisco Anti-War Protest:
The Photos
These pictures explain it much better than I ever could.
by Jennifer
Feb 21, 2003

FUN
Le Snoop Doggy Dogg in La Maison
Helping the French understand the Doggfather with a little help from Google's language translator.
by Jennifer
Feb 1, 2003

RANDOM RANT
Nobody Cares Why You Didn't Answer Your Phone
A lesson in voicemail.
by Jennifer
Jan 10, 2003

FUN
The new Chicken Soup for the Soul books are here!
Books for the last few demographics who do not already have Chicken Soup for their souls.
by Jennifer
Jan 3, 2003

FUN
The Oracle of Starbucks
Enter your or a friend's drink order and be amazed!
by Jennifer
Dec 1, 2002

TECHNOLOGY
Keepin' It Real in Da PHP
What happens when you mix programming with gangsta rap.
by Jennifer
Sept 4, 2002

SOCIETY
(Unsolicited) Advice: "Do I look fat?"
One of the great mysteries of life explained.
by Jennifer
Aug 25, 2002

FUN
Hatemail Generator
Did something you saw on Buttafly piss you off? Here's a handy tool for creating hatemail.
by Jennifer
Aug 8, 2002

FUN
The Liberal Magic Infinity Ball
Just like arguing with real liberals.
by Jennifer
Aug 5, 2002

POLLS
Poll: The Sites That Get More Hits Than Buttafly
What does it mean when a Yanni fan page gets more hits than Buttafly?
by Jennifer
Jun 12, 2002